But Most Importantly, Be Mine.

Prologue: Eventually, say when I am 25, I want to get married. Probably not settle down, but definitely spend the rest of my life with one man. This post is for that man. I know this is five years too soon. But this is to remind me what I need to demand of him. I must not be blinded by the fervor and must not compromise on my indispensable requirements. Of course, this may be rendered useless. I will not settle for sub-standard so I just might not get married at all. If in case I do, it is my fiance’s responsibility to read this post.

Hi.

You are going to spend the rest of your life with me. Are you sure? Rethink. Please consider this as documentary evidence of my official warning to you.
If you’re still so madly in love with me, this is what I want:

A humble wedding.

Ever since I can remember, I thought extravagant weddings were the best kind of weddings. As I grew up, I was familiarized with family politics and I learned that big weddings do not usually mean happy marriages. As I gradually attended more and more weddings, I realized I would be much happier with a humble wedding. Firstly, rich weddings are highly inconvenient. I do not want to be an unmoving, over-dressed doll that needs to walk at the pace of an 8-bit video game character on the very day that I want to jump with joy and laugh and dance and not care if the whole world is looking at me. See, my plan is simple:

1.       ALL traditional rituals and functions must be followed. In case you are not Punjabi, I want to do all your set of rituals, too. We are not going to miss out on even the tiniest tradition.

2.       Anyway most of our pre-wedding functions will be different for you and me. We will each be with our respective families. All my pre-wedding functions will be amongst a small gathering of only those closest to me. Therefore, just family. As for you, I am going to trust you to have sincerely performed all your set of required rituals before getting married to me.

3.       A sangeet. I would prefer that to be more or less private, too. My friends and I are constantly editing the song-list. I have already decided the anchor for the event - my maid of honour. So you can’t have a say in that, sorry.

4.       The shaadi – I want pheras. Even outside a mandir will do. Nothing too fancy, please. I just want my pheras and sindhoor and all that jazz. And lesser the audience, the better.

5.       Basically, I want to make just the Reception an open-to-all event. Rest everything needs to be a family affair. Since 80% chance is that you are a Punjabi, our combined family strength will be 800 people. We need to cut it short to 200. That is our guest list for the sangeet. Okay fine, plus a 100-odd for our friends. Reception, you may invite even 1000 people.

6.       I DO NOT WANT US TO SIT ON A STAGE FOR OUR RECEPTION. It’s a reception! Not an exhibition. We will be moving around constantly, touching the feet of elders here, there and everywhere. We will have a table with the rest of the people. NOT a stage. If you insist otherwise, go for the reception alone.

7.       I want to hire a cool wedding photographer and I will not be made to pose with my hands under my chin phonily.

That’s it. See? I don’t ask for much.

Now, here’s what I expect from you once we’re together (since I’ve already chosen you, the disclosure of my more detailed, essential pre-requisites is not needed here):

Say I’m beautiful.

Defend me at all times. Come home and shout, that’s okay.

Don’t leave me alone anywhere.

Be interesting.

Love me, but don’t spoil me.

Travel light.

If I am marrying you, I sincerely hope it is because we love each other. Even my expression of love to you is restrained until we’re married; and I’m yours.

In this life and beyond,

Candidly yours,

Wannabe Wayfarer.

 

So that the bachcha party doesn't get bored



A page from my Diary

Chennai Office, 1.00 pm.

So after my wonderful trip to Vaishnodevi temple, I flew to Chennai for two weeks, then Bombay last week and flew back here (yes, AGAIN) for continuation of what we label work. Right now, that’s where I am, sitting alone, typing this out in a chilly conference room at the client’s office; wearing a sweater when the temperature outside is 340C. Last night, however, was hot, dirty and sweaty. From afternoon to midnight, I was counting engines, wheel rims, cylinders, slider frames, axles, valves, tube tires, and even nuts and bolts. I was at an unpronounceable remote plant location at the Tamil Nadu-Andhra Pradesh border conducting Physical Verification of our client’s stock. Blah.

On the hour long return journey from the warehouse to the hotel we’re staying at, sandwiched on the backseat between my team member and a client representative, I received plenty of calls from Bombay. All day too, my phone has been flooded with calls and messages.Today is my birthday. 2^nd April. I have completed nineteen years on this planet and I have no vision, aim or plan for my future. A big thank you to all who wish me well!

Listening to: Make It Up As You Go! – Plain White T’s

 

Hotel Room, 10.00 pm – Post Dinner

Birthday made bright thanks to memories of the advance celebrations in Bombay last week (especially the scrumptious chocolate cake baked by a sexy Saraf and lovely thoughtful gifts from everyone), surprise cake by work team here, and these precious dedications:

#1 (wishes to remain unnamed)

Birthday - just another day for you and me, right? Nothing more, nothing less; except probably the tiny birthday cake and a little bit of attention here and there. But, who wants that anyway... I kept the same attitude till now. And I am not sure if I am going to, willing to or succumb to changing that attitude to "OMG, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY MONTH! YAYIEE" either. Nevertheless, it’s a special day. Today is special because someone came into the world only to change mine for the better. Guess what? That’s a good enough reason for you and me to celebrate.

You are Dear, Harshika Gupta, and you should know that. Never contemplate on how much you have positively contributed to my life because despite the physical distance, trust me - YOU TOP MY LIST. Being with you - real time or just spiritually is just unbelievable. Sometimes I wonder how you can make all my whining, unrealistic love life and ridiculous ambitions seem so normal. Even about being independent, you know... I don't think I'd feel so free if you wouldn't keep reminding me of it.

A mere 'thank you' won't suffice for the strength that you give me. But you must know that I am very lucky and grateful to God to have let me sensed this unbound, unconditional and permanent friendship with Harshika Gupta.

I Love You. Oh! And yea, Happy Birthday. May you have a million reasons to smile and a trillion reasons to laugh! (My April calendar says "A smile is a laugh that bursts", cool na?) Yours, Guess who

#2 (my favorite Shetty)

Dear Harshika,
I find having pen pals amusing. Considering FaceBook doesn't allow that anymore, why would anyone write mails and letters when you can chat and whatspp(darn technology). I know you have too much work to write letters to me. But I declare you my pen pal. I will keep you updated about my (and others) life when you are away whether you like it or not.
Anyway, here's a poem I wrote for this awesome occasion of your birthday. It's called YOU.(Genius me)
Hope you like it!!

You.

The craziness, the lovesickness
Made me think I was the only one
Then I realized you were there too
To share in the fun.

You have some wiring wrong
Considering the things you say and do.
You say the funniest and darnest things
And I actually believe you.

I need to learn to love like you
With all your heart and soul
You do what you want and
Don't always follow the rules.

Every friend has a place
A season that he brings
You are the friend that
Always resembles the spring.

I wish that you soon figure out
What it is that you want to do
It doesn't really matter to me
Coz whatever it is you'd be true.

And that's your share of sappiness
For the friend you have been to me
And I pray for only happiness
From the heavens to shower on thee.

Happy Birthday, Harshika Gupta!!! :D

Ps. Tried to say the above in poetry but nothing really rhymes with Gupta! :(

- Trupthi.

 How lucky am I :)

Feeling blessed,

Wannabe Wayfarer.

People & Me

I know a strong, beautiful and independent woman. She is my best friend and I am extremely proud of her. She inspires me to keep my creativity alive and courageously follow my dreams. We’re very different from each other. I’m selfish. She is kind, caring & will voluntarily go out of her way to help someone; anyone; everyone.

We don’t meet every day; wouldn’t even if we could; and cannot because she lives in a different country now.  So her name flashing on my phone is eagerly awaited and makes me smile wide. She calls me when – she misses me, she is happy, anxious or sad. And at each instance, I feel honoured that she chose to call me.

Through the years that I have known and adored her, I can now broadly identify reasons for when she is feeling low. One of them is that she lets people’s moods affect hers. It’s like having the super-ability of Jasper Cullen in reverse. Bluntly, it is more of a disability. Empathy is fine. But letting that person’s problem become your own is not.

God gives enough strength to each; you only have to seek it within you. Most can find that strength and deal with the problem or move on. However, some are too busy crying to take any corrective action and will whine to anyone with ears. I avoid such people at all costs. “You cannot save a damsel who loves her distress”.  So why waste any shred of your time or mind’s space on their sob-stories? Unless you’re a gossip monger, of course. In which case, please don’t read my posts.

Oh! Gossip – the unavoidable frenemy. I bother about only one type of gossip – that at the workplace. Because negative gossip affects your image in front of potential colleagues to whom you cannot always prove otherwise. Elsewhere, I don’t care even if people cast aspersions on my character. Likewise, whether a person likes me or not is irrelevant to me. I was not put on this planet to please you; though I definitely like being appreciated.

If you know what you’re doing is right and that you’ve put in your best efforts, then no criticism, taunt or snide remark should affect your disposition. Growing up, I was in search for my self-identity. I still am. I think it is more of a process that upgrades as experience teaches me more lessons. However, by now, I have established my ideals, principles and my perception of right and wrong. I am secure with and confident of my views. So I seek nobody’s approval for my actions. There are no more than 5 people at any point in my life whose opinions play an unparalleled role in my decision-making. Anything the “society” says about my life choices, opinions or actions, is immaterial.

THIS is my way to happiness and contentment – my own approval for my actions; being responsible for my own decisions; answerable primarily to myself. It is a liberating feeling.

Mind chow: Associate with spiteful people, their negativity rubs off onto you. While just a simple conversation with happy, optimistic and carefree people brightens your aura too.

-Wannabe Wayfarer